Hey ya'll, I have a question for you!
First a bit of background to lead up to the question:
I'm trying to get back into some sort of healthy work out routine. Growing up I had the chance to be a professional soccer player, I played on all sorts of different competitive traveling soccer teams, ran marathons and a triathlons, played volleyball and field hockey, fenced, rock climbed and spelunked, rode horses, and was known as "the girl with muscles." I was the type that thought boot camp sounded like fun. I was in the gym, on the field, or on a track every day for hours. I was hard core. To the point that the sexist football coach, that would not allow girls in the school gym while the football team was training, made me an exception because I trained so hard I put his boys to shame and they worked harder when I was around. This isn't about bragging. Its giving you a glimpse at my old life to set the context.
And then I began to get sick.
Fatigue and pain became a constant in my life. Well, if you've ever had a coach you know that if you show any weakness they will just push you harder. And so I pushed harder. I literally played myself into the ground. It was getting to the point that I could barely move and yet I was still sprinting and tackling on the soccer field. One day, during the middle of the game I collapsed and had to be carried off the field. I used crutches for six months after that.
For years I tried to get back into it. But my illnesses are progressive. The harder I pushed, the worse my consequences became. I don't mean just tired. I mean bed ridden. If you've ever pulled a week of all nighters, then you are starting to get a little bit closer to how I feel most days. I don't just mean a little bit of swelling, but to the point I can't even fit into my shoes. And the pain - well that is on a whole other level. This isn't about pity. Its giving you a glimpse at my new normal.
Eventually I came to terms with finding balance. I want to exercise, but my idea of exercise today is much much different than it was before. I cannot be hard core - hard core will kill me. The last two years I've gotten much better at doing the little things and giving myself credit for it. However, having previously been an athlete, it is EXTREMELY frustrating to do just the movements without weights as a weight lifting routine, or just go for a walk, or do a moderate speed on the elliptical, or do a yoga routine with many adaptations. These things don't feel like workouts to me. In the past, I have often done more and pushed myself harder which then results in serious painful consequences that takes weeks to recover from. I try to remind myself that I could be able to do even less in the future so I should enjoy all that I can do now. But there are times that its really hard to be positive about it. Its really hard to find the balance. Its really hard to stick with it when I am questioning if this is even really a work out.
But I need exercise. Too much is a bad thing for me, but none is even worse. My muscles are beginning to atrophy. I need to move. And I wouldn't mind losing some weight either, though my main goal is just to get healthier.
So as I attempt to get into a regular workout routine... I'm asking you for a favor. To keep me motivated to stick to doing those things I can do, to help me find the right balance between too much and too little, to figure out how to thrive in the new normal,
I am asking for your favorite work-out songs. The ones that keep you going.
I like pretty much all music. Not a huge country fan - but I do listen to it sometimes. So really, whatever you've got, I'd appreciate!
I'd be happy to send you a mixed CD with everyone's suggestions in return!
